Saturday 15 September 2007

Dan's Americana, Part 5: The Hotel, The Casino & The Niagara Falls

Saturday 15 September 2007

The Crowne Plaza was our agreed destination for an overnight stay, before hitting Niagara Falls the next morning. It was $125 per room, reduced to $75 with our special vouchers, to make an amazing £37 per night! Wow! My local Travelodge in Lincolnshire costs £50 a night!

I was actually getting incredibly annoyed with how much the UK seems to have been ripping me off all these years! Oh well. Like all good Brits, I'll enjoy grumbling, moan when I get home, then try and change then UK government by... moaning to friends and hoping "six degrees of separation" reaches the P.M.


The hotel was quite impressive. I think it was three-star, but it would easily pass for four in the UK. It was very tall with hundreds of rooms, ample parking, and had just undergone a $22 million refurbishment -- meaning there were glitzy interiors, clean lifts and nice rooms. Incidentally, each room had two double-beds as standard, so you could easily sleep four people in one. That's £9 each, per night. The word "bargain" doesn't do it justice!

After dumping our stuff, we decided to chill out in the hotel's bar in the early-evening, which was a little underwhelming -- considering how great the rooms were. It was dark and half-empty, with sports on TV to entertain drinkers: baseball, basketball and poker (if that counts as a sport). Anyway, the food was alright and the lager was acceptable after a long drive, but there clearly isn't the same "hit the pub" mentality in the US as there is in the UK!

Later that night, we decided to visit a casino just across the street from our hotel: the Seneca Niagara. It looked enticing and we'd mistaken it for an art gallery on the way to the hotel. Inside, the interior was a sea of one-armed bandits, craps tables and roulette wheels, all twinkling and chiming incessantly.

Unfortunately, I wandered in with a digital camera slung over my shoulder and was told I'd have to hand it in. No probs, but the "handing-in place" was shut (huh?), so I was led through the casino like a criminal to a "back-up handing-in place" (huh??) I got a few dirty looks as I was led through the complex, with people probably thinking I was a card-counter or something!

Then, having deposited my camera with some shop girls, who gave me a receipt so I could get it back later, I was abandoned by my security guard "chauffeur" and found myself being asked for I.D by another guard at a mid-way checkpoint! Nothing I had on me would satisfy him of my identity! Co-Op dividend card? No. Orange top-up card? Nada. Thankfully, one of my party happened to be carrying my passport for me, so I was allowed through. Not a great start to the evening, though!

After that, I didn't feel in the mood to throw money away on any games, so we just mooched around really. It was glitzy and bright, but a bit sad really. One old woman was sat in a wheelchair that had been pushed up to a slot-machine and was furiously pushing coins inside -- whilst hooked up to an oxygen tank! We left them all to it after 40 minutes. I didn't feel like James Bond in there.

The next morning, we checked out of the Crowne Plaza and drove around Buffalo trying to find Niagara Falls -- which sounds easier than it sounds! You'd think the second biggest waterfall on the planet would stick out like a sore thumb, but you actually need to cross a bridge to get a good viewing angle.

The best side of Niagara Falls (the part people think of), is on the Canadian side, so it's best to head there, The American side isn't terrible, it's just nowhere near as good. To get into Ontario, Canada, you have to cross the Rainbow Bridge, passing through U.S customs on one side... then hitting a snag at Canadian customs... because one of us didn't bring their "green slip" you fill in when entering the US on the plane. The Canadians wanted to see that. Bugger.

Oh well, we were directed to a holding area and had to fill another one in. No biggie, except the Canadian cops really like to pose and make you feel like a criminal. I mean, we all have our passports, isn't that enough? Isn't Canada part of the Commonwealth? Let me in!

Eventually, we were let through over the Rainbow Bridge, with the Niagara River flowing beneath us. You can see the falls in the distance to your left, but because the bridge is high up, you don't appreciate their size. Yet.


I felt a bit sorry for Canada when I got across, as the first thing you see is a big Planet Hollywood. Always in America's shadow, eh? But the thing that really struck me, as is how many huge buildings there were! You don't expect to see massive casinos and other big buildings along the edge of the Niagara River, do you? I expected a waterfall, a big river, some pleasure cruises, a visitor centre, some souvenir shops, and that's about it! But it's not like that in the slightest: it's a veritable entertainment mecca!

We drove along the road that follows the Niagara River, populated by hundreds of tourists and some London double-decker buses, quite bizarrely, before parking up and entering the main Visitor's Centre. It was undergoing some renovation, but was basically some shops and suchlike, with an entrance to Journey Behind The Falls (i.e, you stand on the "table rock" protrusion just next to the falls.)


Outside, you can get your proper look at the Niagara Falls, standing alongside the fence with all the other tourists (and Amish people I momentarily mistook for extras from The Village!) It's an impressive sight (the Falls, not the Amish), with the topside resembling flooded grassland, as the river pours over the edge, thousands of gallons a second. It makes your head swim thinking it hasn't stopped this cycle for over 30,000 years! That's a lot of water!

From here, you can begin a leisurely walk away from the Horseshoe Falls, following the river from the pavement/road at the top of the cliff above. Far below you can see the Maid Of The Mist boats taking people up close to the Falls themselves. The American Falls can also be seen on the other side, next to the Bride's Veil (a separate, singular waterfall.)


The weather was great, so it was a very enjoyable walk up the edge, constantly taking photos of the river, waterfalls and buildings as we made our way toward the Maid Of The Mist's port. We got our tickets and were slowly herded down from the cliff top, to the boat jetty, stopping to have your photo taken in front of a green-screen (to collect later, if you want.) Everyone gets a flimsy bit of plastic to wear, before getting on the Maid and beginning your trip back up the Niagara.


When the boat trip begins, you pass the American/Bridal Falls on your left and are told its history over the boat's speakers. Amusingly, the American side is full of gimmicks to combat the fact "their side" isn't as impressive as the Canadian side, with platforms for people to walk along at the foot of the Falls and a huge tower people can go up and stand on its edge. The ideal place for a bungee jump, actually!

Anyway, you begin to approach the main Horseshoe Falls pretty quickly. The return trip is probably 20 minutes. It's certainly very impressive being at sea level, with the height and breadth of the Falls really appearing epic. They're not as deafening as you'd expect and, while you certainly get wet, you're not soaked through and the boat is remarkably steady. I was prepared to get seasick, but it hardly rocks in the slightest.


On your right, you can see tourists on the Journey Behind The Falls event, all gathered outside a "cave" cut into the cliff, much higher up than us. The boat is definitely the best option of the two, but they must get some great views and, technically, get closer to the actual Falls water.

After 5 minutes taking photos of the Falls, which look like melted vanilla ice cream, half-blending into the clouds at the top, the Maid turns round and heads back to the jetty, for you to disembark, collect your hugely-expensive green-screen photo, and buy souvenirs. I went for the commemorative wall-plaque. Oooh.

I heartily recommend going to see Niagara Falls!

Part 4: Road Trip To Buffalo
Part 3: Food & Supermarkets
Part 2: Wildlife & Weather
Part 1: Coming To America